Friday, 27 September 2013

Trolling for comments and babbling on anon.

It's pretty tricky trolling the comment section these days.

 Storm season has arrived. photo
Did you hear?  Popular Science shut off its comment section because a few nasty old trolls were so intent on spreading their own special brand of hatred that they ruined it for everyone.  Imagine that. Of course Popular Science attracts the dregs of humanity, what online content director Suzanne LaBarre so eloquently terms "shrill, boorish specimens of the lower internet phyla."  It's the nature of science itself, isn't it? The function of science is to challenge the very ideas people hold as "truth," and that always evokes passion.  Plus  Popular Science is massive.  It's an institution.  All the big sites draw their fair share of trolls.

Trolls are the internet arm of the zombie apocalypse, and they're ubiquitous.

Nobody loves a troll.
Random unrelated really bad photo of the winds in front of our first pineapple express this season.

There are an awful lot of them out there, too, spreading darkness and sowing animosity, waaaaaaay more than there are people willing to actually say that kind of thing to your face. I wasn't surprised that BikeSnob had trolls, cause he's a blogger who actually sort of makes a living from the avails of blogging and everything, and that means he's almost an institution, too.  I was surprised, however, to discover I've actually attracted my very own troll (s?)!!  While it's true they are technically trolling on Snob's blog, it's me 'they' hate.

Would you look at that! They've awarded me the Lantern Rouge for worst commenter ever. My hero Svein took home the coveted red jersey this year, and he still  kicked ass, so I can rock that.  I like red, remember?

A younger me would have felt upset or intimidated upon reading this first comment:

but my grade seven teacher, Mr Cej always said "Don't believe everything you read.  Consider the source," and as got older I grew to love him for that.  This is the same commenter who, when I mentioned the small boy's enthusiasm for his new road bike, warned me sternly and in no uncertain terms that if I allowed my son to pursue his dream of road racing, I would cause irreparable harm to my son, and to his ability to reproduce.  And he always speaks with the voice of absolute authority, of course, since he is always always right about everything.  I didn't have time to reply to his ridiculous assertions at the time, however, because I was about to head out the door to meet with my lovely friend Lido Crema, son of a professional cyclist, life-long  road racer and father of three.

Besides.  You shouldn't feed the trolls.

 There's a light at the end of the tunnel, anyway, an end to the storm in sight.

I'm trying to be the change I want to see, to create a little corner of the planet where people have a healthy relationship with themselves, each other and Spaceship Earth as a whole. If I'm attracting my very own trolls, it means my message is touching nerves, waking people up, and that makes me happy.  The best words ever uttered are "You inspire me..."  but this is good, too. If the trolls are a-hating me, it can only mean one thing.

Obviously I've arrived!  Next thing you know, I'll be an institution, too.  I choose Pope, please.  When I grow up, I wanna be the Holey C.

Please and thank you.


  1. Worst commenter on BSNYC? That's a pretty big distinction. I don't buy it though. A lot of Snob's commenters automatically go to the back of the pack with their handles alone, even before they start fouling the comments field with their monotribe.

    At least your brain is in gear when you comment.

    1. Cheers!
      Sometimes it seems like I've been lobotomised, but I always own it.

  2. arrived a long time ago, beautiful - right when you started to brighten the world using thoughtful & intelligent provocation with your ability to make people address subjects they fear or don't understand or maybe simply weren't aware of...'re quite adept at infusing humor & beauty throughtout your messages so that reading your work is fun rather than just a plod through 'something babble thinks we should be aware of - ewww !!!"...

    ...there are those who 'take the time' to use provocation to enlighten the world & there are those who 'waste their time' provoking discord through vitriol because they don't understand how to address their own deepseated shortcomings...'s usually pretty obvious who's who...

  3. Babble, I have a BRILLIANT idea! When I get things in order on my island and the proper bike paths are installed, (no roads, by the way...won't be needed) YOU COULD COME BE THE POPE OF THE ISLAND!!!!!!!!


    Plus, then we could allow only merriment and harmony on our island...all haters will have to walk the plank and swim back to the rock they crawled out of.


  4. ...roadqueen - you could allow pedal cars...they're kinda like recumbents for people who are to lazy to balance...i may buy one & i could make "vrooom, vrooom" noises when i feel like going for a drive instead of a ride...

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  6. I use my recumbent bike as a vehicle of thoughtful & intelligent provocation. That and to give my scranus a break from the wedgie seat once in a while.

    Keep spreading the good word Babs!

  7. When I grow up I'm going to invent a digital fly swatter for the likes of CJ. Kersplatsky
    Sometimes the comments section is a bit like a pavement (ok, sidewalk), you just have to step carefully around the dog turds, but that's OK.

  8. I regularly read Bike Snob but his blog is always so long I run out of puff to get around to the comments. In Australia we would call him a shit stirrer, which means if he didn't generate some trolls he wouldn't be succeeding (and of course he is). I confess I used to get into the whole commenting thing but now I only say positive stuff (especially as I don't comment anonymously anymore).

  9. I'm seconding what David said, sort of...except I read Veloria's Lovely Bicycle Blog. She started making longer posts and I have the attention span somewhere between a butterfly and a goldfish anymore it seems so I kinda tuned out... Dont stir shit, just spread goodness. =)

  10. You're a woman, and you possess the ability to articulate your own blog (articulate=intelligent). So start with those two things, plus throw in the fact that you're attractive, and of course you're going to attract some Neanderthal. Ignore the rift-raft and keep up the interesting posts and great photography.